The year is 2045, and being a white man is illegal-- or should I say, "identifying" as a white man? All white men are sent to reeducation camps, where we are taught that we are evil and control society. My teacher is a black parapalegic trans woman
"Now, repeat after me, class" she says. "I am an evil white man.'
"I am an evil white man," we all say in unison
'I have white privilege'
'I have white privilege', we say-- in our reeducation camp.
"Big governemt is good"
"Big
government is good," we say.
"The state is more effective at solving problems than the free market"
"The state---" "excuse me, miss" I interrupt. "Isn't it true that capitalism is responsible for most of the innovations in the world?"
"It is not my job to educate you," she says.
"But miss-- aren't you my teacher in this reeducation camp?"
She is
stunned. The other students in the class's jaws are on the floor.
She regains her composure. "you are gaslighting me." she says simply.
"No, I say. You are gaslighting us." Suddenly, two large African-American men come and drag me away. They are more muscular than me, but of course it can't possible be because of genetics.
I am placed in the electric chair and strapped up. They are going to kill me, and everything is there to watch... When suddenly, I hatch a brillaint idea.
"Any last words, white man?" President Chelsea Clinton asks
"Actually," I say, smiling quietly, "I am not a white man. I identify as a woman."
The audience gasps. Chelsea does not know what to say. "What? That...no..."
"I identify as a woman, and am therefore not a white man. So you can't keep me in this camp"
The audience is stunned, and nobody knows what to say. "I guess...let hi--let her go." says Chelsea
The huge, muscular
black men, who naturally have more fast-twitch muscle fibers than me, start undoing the straps on my chair, when suddenly another white man stands on his chair. "I identify as a woman" he says.
The democrats running the camp are terrified. Another one stands up: "I identify as a woman."
"I identify as a woman."
"I identify as a woman."
'I identify as a woman"
Soon, we are running around beating the shit out of everyone in the cvamp and they can't do anything about it,